Sartorial Fascism: Snorting Steven Klein

I’m not allowed to say avant garde. Post apocalyptic hyperreality photographer was provided by a Delirious boi who hates S.K.dizzle. What does Steven Klein take? I hope Prozac. So many of his photos are absolutely depressing that they’d probably make Delirious kiddo slit his wrists. I noticed that he seems to have an ongoing motif of horses, bodily injuries, and half–naked or almost–naked or fully–naked delinquent–esque people. But as depressing as they are, they are so amazing. Not the same with his editorials. My favourite editorial of his also happens to be my first digestion of Klein. The Tomorrow Style, seen in L’Uomo Vogue, November 2006 I think. Art as the dogma. I thought the whole thing of having global warming as a theme was so cliché and so OMG I’ve heard enough about global warming and I’m already a fuel–efficient fool so I don’t need Vogue telling me about it. But I have to admit, the editorial was brilliant, even though the content was so lawlzy ridiculous. Haha a fucking gas mask as protection against global warming. Ok, no problem. If I did that, I’d probably get arrested. By CTU and Jack Bauer because I would look like a plotting terrorist. And why would you put a mask on yourself but not a baby? But schwat! That editorial was still Indian teepee powWOW. He had another editorial that had a similar theme. Apocalyptic Ritual, the same vibe and aura. But that one was so butt–ugly. Ripoff, copycat of the Balenciaga SS07 ad campaign, that whole matter of cyborg meets suburbia. And then that was just followed by some of Steven Klein’s worst work ever. He probably took too much Prozac and lost his gold finger and green thumb. In W, “Stefano+Domenico's Dolce Vita”. Naked pix0rz of Dolce and Gabbana. I think Klein had too much testosterone pumping through his veins and tried to make it sultry. But it was so trashy, so wannabe trailer–trash porn. The only one picture that I liked out of the bunch of barf hag faces was the one with the some religious figure, cardinal? IDK my BFF Jill but that was the one with the most clothing in it. And then, waaaah, Steven Klein went soft on us with Naomi Campbell. I’ve got more than a handful for Naomi Campbell. He tried to make her look good in that June 2007 stint for W. But why would Campbell’s Chunky Chicken n00b–le soup ever be wearing a fluorescent cross–guard vest at a dinky dock? Honk to bring back the troops and Steven Klein.

Natski